I collect internets
This is the story of how I almost got two copies of the World Wide Web stored on my web server. Yes, the entire World Wide Web. 2 Copies. Now, I’m a geek so I’m not sure how much of this “normal” people (like yourself) will be able to follow, so if you find yourself […]
Could you be a BMW driver?
So you think you might have what it takes to be a BMW driver, eh? You’ve got the money, you’ve got a hankering for some German metal, but do you have the right attitude? Not everyone is cut out to be in command of the Ultimate (Crap) Driving Machine ™ and the following questions will […]
This month’s searches
This month, people have mainly been stumbling across this blog as they searched for: “green poo toddler” / “baby yellow vomit” / “dark green poo toddler” / “pale poo vomit” / etc. etc. Nice to know that I’m still number one for the rainbow of diseased bodily fluids. Yay. “bmw angel eyes daytime running lights […]
Mortgage Help
One of my more useful sites is the Mortgage Calculator. Actually, it’s now so useful I’ve renamed it Mortgage Analyser. A calculator is something that sits on your desk which you type 55378008 into and turn it upside down for a juvenile flashback. An analyser however, is something that throws more data at you than […]
Number One!
Searching Google for “brightly coloured poo” brings up my blog as the first hit out of 17,800. Naich’s Blog. Number One for people who like their turds with a bit more colour. I found that out because the server logs (ho ho ho) showed that 2 people have landed at my page following a search […]
Still gasping after 8 months
October 19th 2006. A historic day… President Bush welcomed President-Elect Felipe Calderon of Mexico to the White House, JCC marketing were honored at regional conference, and Schrödinger application scientist Shashi Rao discussed features and capabilities of Phase 2.0, as well as underlying scientific methodologies. Yes, as you can see, Google is utterly shit at finding […]
Seven things no-one tells you about your first kid
You might be lacking sleep and money, but one thing you won’t be short of is advice. This will come from friends, family, cow-orkers or just people who come up to you in shops. It usually goes along the lines of “don’t worry – it gets easier. After 20 years, ha ha”. Whether you merely […]
Things I don’t like
I haven’t been almost run over by a bus for a few weeks now and to be honest, it feels a bit odd. Maybe fate is storing up a biggy for me? Look out for reports in the papers of someone being simultaneously squished between two buses and a BMW. In the meantime here is […]
Bus-ted!
I almost got run over by a bus as I was cycling home the other day. People jumping red traffic lights is a common enough occurance round here but – and I don’t know why – it’s somehow a bit more shocking when it’s a fucking great green double decker bastard fucking bus. Sorry for […]
The art of communication
I had an interesting conversation with a BMW driver this morning. Well, the conversation itself wasn’t all that great (as you’ll see later); what made it interesting was the fact that it happened at all, that it contained more than 2 words, wasn’t shouted and didn’t have accompanying hand gestures. Let’s be plain here – […]